I was nervous about my interview. I’m always hoping to do a good job, and my chance to see if I could get more in to social work was no different. I was told I’d be meeting with the directors, Ed and Ralph.
The Carlin-esque man with the “no f’s to give” grey beard entered. He asked if I was Crystal. “Yes. Are you Ed.”
“No. Ed’s the Asian guy.”
If I was to script what it would be like to meet someone who’d turn out to be such an inspiration, I wouldn’t have written it like that. But that was one the amazing things about Ralph Ward, he didn’t do as expected. Just as well to figure that out at the start, I suppose.
Ralph was open about his past, but not in a way that was an attempt to summon any emotional response. He’d been adopted out of an orphanage. He’d been reluctantly called upon to participate in Vietnam. He worked with children in care, and ultimately made a career of doing the right thing and getting others to do the same. He was the co-founder and director at the time of Youth and Family Programs. The agency is a big player, lots of programs, homes, services, etc. A guy could really enjoy the power that comes from such standing. Ralph, on the other hand, took pride when he was mistaken for a janitor or homeless. Seriously.
He was driven by principle, more than practice. He was a person who saw that there were a number of right ways to do something as long as you’re doing it to improve things for humans. But, you HAD to do something. “Just do something.” He had little tolerance for inaction, especially when someone was being bullied or mistreated. He believed that doing something, even if it turns out to be wrong, surpasses doing nothing.
Conflict made his eyes twinkle. He saw it as a healthy sign that people were using their brains and not adopting the herd mentality. He wouldn’t hesitate to verbal spar with any person, regardless of if it could have been bad for business. He was a person who didn’t leave things unsaid.
When I left his agency, he told me (jokingly…I think) that I’d never make it at the County. Why? “You wear too much camouflage.”
His support and hopes to make the world a better place didn’t stop when someone stopped working for him. I won’t delete my last emails with him. My subject line… “Fuck this Shit O’clock.” He was near his end, but didn’t hesitate to be spot on with his feedback. He wrapped up with questions about how things were headed at the County. What he was really asking though is “Are there still enough people willing to risk things to do what’s right?”
Cutting my social work teeth in the culture that he created was perfect. Right, wrong, or indifferent (blatant plagiarism); Just. Do. Something.
Bifocals and Barbells 