#DadJoke
Joy is like a battery; it has to be charge, it can power other things, and much like battery power on my precious cell phone, it’s an absolute necessity. I hope that we all strive to bring some level of joy to our surroundings in our own ways. I don’t want to become one of those people pleasers who makes it a mission of trying to make others happy. But I do hope that some of my interactions result in people feeling “not worse.” There’s plenty of times in which I have to be “that guy,” the one who has to say the hard things or hold the lines, but when it’s not one of those situations, but intent to be the opposite of a chi vampire.
If you don’t know what a chi vampire is, you may be one. They’re the folks that after you’ve chatted with them you feel depleted of energy. Like your soul became a discarded empty Capri Sun juice pouch. Given the choice, I’d rather be more like a chi Tesla charging station (without the accompanying virtual signaling) and a vitality leech.
I can tell when I’m veering toward the vampire stage. There’s a pretty steady consciousness stream of sarcasm in my head. When it’s time to charge my joy stores, I get worse at gatekeeping those comments in the brain. They just freestyle their way out the old mouth hole; where you can try to do some clean up about them, but you can’t make folks unhear them.
Some people have much better controls of the use of their energy than others. My social battery runs hot which means it can burn out quickly. People can probably see it on my face as easily as a digital batter bar over my head like I’m a video game character.
Just as there are different ways to bring joy to others, there’s different ways to recharge your own positivity. They can be complex efforts of self-care or it maybe you just need to be still. I try to have a variety of rechargers in my tool belt. Some include construction paper, some include writing random things for others to read, and many include food or exercise (I’m basically a puppy). When it’s time to restore my positivity, I also have to look at what my attention is digesting.
Recently my Spotify found itself “stuck” (at my doing) in a loop of playlists like Villain Mode, Angry Girl Workout, and Bad Bitch Vibes. It was song after song of jilted-ness with revenge themes or “my power comes from your inferiority” themes. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to key a car or buy some Louboutin red bottom shoes so “bitches can be hatin’” I’m literally at zero risk of either, especially since I had to google Louboutin to spell it only to learn those shoes are $1,500! Suddenly I’m a bitch that be hatin’!
I also found myself consuming documentaries of murder and dysfunction. I enjoy human behavior so much I’ve made a living out of it. Watching those shows is easily justified as satisfying that curiosity. And the fact that shows like Dahmer are “chart toppers” tells me I’m not the only one who watches stuff like that. Much like I’m not at risk of those damn shoes, I’m not destined for crime either. Which begs the question; what’s the harm is watching or listening to stuff like that?
There’s probably not a lot of risk. And I certainly can’t address what such shows do for others. But for me, I’m a strong believer in the hypothesis that you get what you give. If I wander in to work sour in attitude, people will likely engage with me in the same demeanor. I “just feel like” whether you bring positivity to your day or negativity, the universe will respond in kind. Basically, if all I see it negativity, I’m much more primed to see more negativity. There’s enough of that around, I don’t need to go looking for more.
So, murdering body builder documentary went off, and Monty Python came on. Nothing quite like dead parrots and silly walks to cleanse the palate. I’m genuinely thankful for the shenanigans and the reminders not to take life too seriously. What I particularly watched was their 2014 “Live (Mostly)” show on Netflix. They’re all in their 70’s at the time. They’re still painfully funny and the silliness of it all was restorative.
So chi vampires, bring it. I’m ready to listen to how somehow your doctor’s office’s receptionists brother in law has some impact on your day. Hopefully my hype will last a long time. Buuuuttt… if you see me melting into my chair while intermittently uttering “wow. that’s crazy….wow…..crazy,” maybe ask me what’s up with Monty Python. Or better yet,….buy me some of those red bottom shoes (bwah ha)!
Thanks for reading!
Bifocals and Barbells 