Two beautiful, vivacious young girls arrive in Paris for “holiday.” They meet the handsome young Frenchman who makes them blush with compliments and shares a cab with them. Then some Albanian bad guys kidnap those girls with the intent to auction them off as sex slaves. Luckily, one girl has the bad-ass black-ops dad with a particular set of skills who will rectify her being Taken.
And this is what people generally think is human trafficking.
January is Human Trafficking Awareness and Prevention month. Which seems like a good time to talk about prevention. Turns out, it’s a little different than just avoiding strangers in the Paris airport.
My work has a focus on Commercial Sexual Exploitation of Children (CSEC). CSEC and trafficking go hand-in-hand.
Numbers grab people’s attention. As result, I can be asked for things such as how many children are trafficked, or are at risk of being trafficked, in our community? The answer doesn’t reflect the situation as it exists here (or in most places); we had zero kids abducted in Paris. But that doesn’t mean there isn’t risk.
Given the digital age we live in, kids can be trafficked without ever leaving their home. The legal definition of trafficking includes “exploiting in an obscene manner.” There are over 38,000 children in Shasta County; by that definition; if they have access to the internet, access to humans, a desire to be connected to other humans, and a body; they are at some level of risk of exploitation/trafficking.
If you think you know all your kid’s internet activity because you have controls set or whatnot, you’re wrong. If you think knowing the most popular apps used by pedophiles protects your kids, you’re still wrong.
The amount of points of access kids have to the interweb is probably too high a number to calculate. In my little home right now; there are at least 9 different ways for me to find the internet or for the internet to find me. Regarding the apps; maybe at some point I’ll see some dark web version of how we got to sexual exploitation; but as for now it’s only been the harmless apps we all use that have tripped up most kids. Snap chat, Instagram, and Facebook all have real world examples right here of shitty situations. That’s not the fault of the apps, I’m sure the Myspace of olden days had creepers and I’m sure that whatever comes after Snap chat et al will have creepers too.
Those creepers are good too. They are much more practiced at getting what they want than our kids are at avoiding it. The bad guys don’t care that the kid is an honor student or a fringe kid, boy or girl, they too have a very particular set of skills and if our kids aren’t prepared, they can fall into the trap.
“Sweet. I’ll just tell my kid not to talk to strangers” Okay boomer. It’s far less frequent that it’s the stranger who exploits. Far more often than not, kids fall into traps with people they know.
I’ve worked with a lot of kids who absolutely meet the legal definition of sexually exploited. Not yet has one felt they were exploited. Every one has thought they were calling the shots in whatever relationship they were in. Every. Single. One. They saw themselves as using their bodies to get their needs met, to help their boyfriend/girlfriend, or because they were choosing to “party”. I’d argue that there’s not a lot of “choice” involved when a 14 year old sleeps with a nasty older person to get some dope, but it’s hard to convince the “strong independent teen” of my side of the argument.
As depressing as it all sounds, it’s not a foregone conclusion that our kids will be trafficked. Education, support, and awareness are all bad guy antidotes:
- Teach kids boundaries about their personal body: Our bodies are ours and we get to choose what happens to them. Remind them of the importance of this even in situations when they feel pressured. Don’t wait till they’re 14 to have this chat; start having it before they’re 5. You don’t need to make it naughty, just let them know they are the boss of their body. Reinforce that message by not making them give a hug to that smelly aunt with a mustache that they only see once a year.
- Remind them that the digital world is forever: Teens are going to send nude pictures. And they are going to think those nudes are safe. They’re not. Everything that hits the virtual world absolutely can be found again. I’ve seen that enough times to know it to be true. If your person can’t be swayed by that logic, maybe this will work: if they are under 18 and send a naked picture to someone, that someone is now in possession of child pornography. Maybe junior won’t want their BF or GF at risk of being in trouble for child porn.
But most importantly
- Make sure kids know their worth: It sounds very social work-y but if a kid knows the inherent value they hold, they are less susceptible to someone from the dark side trying to help them feel good about themselves.
Maybe you’re not a deep voiced ruggedly handsome protector like Liam Neeson in Taken. Or may-be still you are. Either way, you can still help arm your kids against exploitation pitfalls. But just in case, I’d be happy to take the tickets you got them to go to Paris so you don’t have to worry about that scenario.
Thanks for reading!
Bifocals and Barbells 