Dirty had a real life adult activity the other night. I offered to make pack him some homemade energy bites and orange slices because:
- It’s way past time for me to cut some apron strings, but one of us (me) seems to having trouble with that
- I thought it would be funny (that’s how I make a lot of decisions. I do not advise this method)
- Once a sports/activity parent, always a sports parent
Dirty flatly declined the orange slices. I’m unsure if his performance suffered as a result. If so, that’s on him.
But a couple days later I had an opportunity to recall sports mom life. A buddy co-worker’s kid was playing baseball and I invited myself along. It’s a public place. What’s she gonna do about it?!
The adventure was fun. I got home close to 8 pm and had this smacking moment of “how in the hell do sports parents pull it all off?” I called out Brian and Dirty, “Can you believe that we did all that we did when the kids were little?”
Both boys played baseball from the time they were 5 until high school. They both did summer golf programs. Dirty also ran cross country, wrestled (sort of), and played football. They were both also very active in several groups of 4H and later FFA. There were also brief showings of karate, competitive archery, and this thing called soccer. I think that covers it, but honestly there was so much activity I may have missed some. Those years were amazing, but also so crammed packed that they’re a little blurry.
Brian was able to recall with great detail his efforts in those years. He was a field truck mechanic at the time so he would leave in the wee hours of the morning and finish up jobs in exotic ports of call such as Trinity Center in time to get back in time to coach. That’s all true; and though it was very challenging for him, he was committed to doing it.
But I’m guessing that it was his hard work in those times that clouded his memory. Maybe he thinks I was watching soap operas and eating bon-bons while the nanny readied the boys for school every morning, and then got them to those games. Or maybe my personal assistant would make the cookies or the decorate tables. And maybe our executive chef would prepare the staple busy night “food” of quesadillas while the tutor worked with boys hopped up on post-game snow-cones on their accelerated reading or whatever other stuff required of them. I mean, obviously we needed all that help because I worked full time too.
I know he didn’t mean to act like I wasn’t an important element to the kids being as active as they were. I also know that it was unfair of me to be disappointed that he didn’t follow the script I had in my head about how we should feel good about all we accomplished. Active kids does take a lot of work and sacrifice from a lot of people. Not just Brian. Not just me. Grandparents, neighbors, friend’s parents, parent’s friends, and more were required. And whether or not all that run around it is justified is up for debate.
On the plus side, our boys are incredibly flexible and have a homeostasis that requires them to be active. They are hard workers and have a lot of cool experiences to draw from.
On the down side, they have a homeostasis that requires them to be active. They both have their own challenges with the ability to just be still. They may have gotten that from the nanny. They also had days they went to school exhausted and probably suffered nutritional deficits from a steady diet of quesadillas and sno-cones.
So yah. Not for everyone. And that’s okay too.
I loved every chaotic second of it. Since my sports mom time is over, I’m thinking of taking on sports mom sports momming.
I can thunderously ring my cow bell for you when you get the kids where they need to be. Or maybe I’ll make a banner for you to run through in celebration as you settle in for late evening homework. Or I’ll make violent little snacks to support (and counterbalance) your kids soccer team with the hypersensitive name choice (“We’ll name our league teams after natural disasters so there’s no risk of offending anyone”*eyeroll “Karen, my cousin’s hamster died in an earthquake. How insensitive of you to name a team that!”). Whatever a retired sports mom can do to support your mayhem, tag me in!
Have a great day at soccer/baseball/la crosse/robot wars/scouting/little people military things/whatever, and thanks for reading
Bifocals and Barbells 