I accidentally landed on one of those bullshit motivational quotes the other day, and I’m irritated that I think it’s right. “Don’t tell me how to live my life, Internet. You are not the boss of me!” (she said as she ordered some “necessity” off the Amazon Prime).
”The secret ingredients to true happiness? Decisive optimism, and personal responsibility.”
Duh, on the optimism; but what about that whole personal responsibility stuff?
I’m just a cave-person, I truly don’t have the brain power to make declarations about how personal responsibility directly impacts happiness. Buuuuut,… even my cave-person brain can see that we live in times where personal responsibility has gone further than even taking a back seat. That shit done fell out the car completely. These are times in which someone may admit to a wrongdoing; with numerous qualifiers. I did the thing, but it’s because the sun was in my eyes, or how I was raised, or because the government didn’t do enough for me. The excuses may vary, but they’re consistent in the fact that they take away from the individual’s role in the situation.
I could rant for days with examples, but I’m not feeling like I want to be the “get off my lawn!” guy today. So here’s a story about going to Kansas.
There were lots of wonderful things about the trip; the excitement of Dan’s new adventure, how green everything was, the fried chicken, the other fried chicken, jet rides, and more. But one of the more subtle delights was that it is a place that expects you to take care of your own self.
There were little differences, such as in traffic laws, that oddly pointed out to me how much we depend on external sources as holding the responsibility for our actions.
Example; Kansas doesn’t have “yield before turning left” signs. “Seriously Crystal? You gonna try to tie this to personal agency?” Yup. Wish me luck.
Guess what happens if you don’t yield at the left turn? You get hit. Kansas essentially says “C’mon y’all. Handle your own business.” You don’t crash? Good for you. You crash? Guess what,…still your responsibility.
There’s also an absence of center lines in the road. Know where your vehicle is supposed to be, and stay there. Or don’t. Choice (and resulting consequences) are completely up to you. AND…we drove through an entire road construction site without traffic control. It was wild. People were counted on to be responsible for themselves.
Clearly, decreasing the amount of traffic signs won’t result in an increased awareness of our need to be responsible for our own actions. There’d be crashes, chaos, a veritable free-for-all.
But even without radical changes to road signage, bad things happen every day. That can’t be controlled. But what can be controlled is personal actions and response to circumstances. And I guess that’s what the hokey internet quote was trying to get at. Once we recognize our responsibility, it can free us up from things that happen to us. We get to chose what happens next.
As a footnote: No rental Impalas were injured in the making of this trip even though I was the captain the entire time. Also, just because Kansas expects you to take responsibility for yourself doesn’t mean they don’t care. I mean, after all they do issue storm warnings about 60 mile an hour winds and golf-ball sized hail. They even made sure to mention in their emergency that “people and animals left outside will be injured.” Just make sure you look to make sure you’re not going to get hit if you’re turning left to get out of the storm. Y’all.
Bifocals and Barbells 